Forget going to confession in the little closet at that church over there. Today you get to come see ME! Confess away! Okay. Me first...
*deep breath*
I haven't mopped my floor in two weeks.
Shhh.....no making fun. No judging. No snickering. None of that. I know that cleanliness is next to Godliness, but I have an EXCUSE! (BTW did you know that a friend of mine has a very interesting theory on excuses? She says (imagine a Spanish accent while I say this), "Excuses are like bottoms. Everyone has one and they all stink!" Sorry. Got side-tracked.) I have a hole in my floor. See?
My reason for not mopping should be obvious. I don't want any water to inadvertently find it's way into the hole and be lost forever. Or worse - get the under floor part wet. No, I'm sorry. I can't mop around it, even if its 10 feet away because what if the foundation has shifted over time and I didn't know about it and there's an oh-so-subtle slant and I have water rolling away from me and then when I go to catch the water with a dish towel I slip on the wet floor and break a leg??? See? Not only am I not mopping so that the under floor part doesn't get wet, I'm not mopping so that I don't break my left femur. It all makes sense.
No worries, I will grab my potato masher and say five Martha Stewarts before I go to the craft store to by that perfect something to make homemade ornaments for my Christmas tree this year.
Whew! I feel like a lead weight has been lifted off of my shoulders! Now it's your turn...go ahead...and don't worry - your feet will come clean as long as you scrub them with an S.O.S. pad after you leave.
Must Have Wide Leg Jeans
4 days ago
3 comments:
That was too funny! Love your 5 Martha Stewarts!
You wanna know my confession? I NEVER clean our master bathtub. My husband is the one who takes baths all the time. If he wants it clean, he can clean it himself. I almost feel mean ... almost. :)
My secret....I can never seem to get all of the laundry done. So if I know someone is coming over and I have laundry sitting in my fr I just push it into the bathroom connected to the laundry room. Then I pray they don't need to use the bathroom!
*giggle*
Okay, I STILL have dishes and pots and pans sitting on the kitchen table from cleaning out the cupboards after the mouse invasion. Sanitizing the cupboards is just one thing I keep putting off and I just paid Emily $10 to do a big portion of it.
I have all sorts of fall baking I want to do but can't because of the kitchen mess so now I'm FORCED to finish my project. I want apple cake...
I think I'll take a page out of your book and say a few Martha Stewarts before I begin.
Post a Comment